Traveling for Thanksgiving is an always for us. We don’t travel for Christmas and we don’t live near any of our relatives. Yesterday was a terrible horrible no good day. As I reflect on it, there is nothing I can do but laugh. I hope you’ll do the same. *Warning… f-bomb used below.*
8:00 am – Epic battle with Malone #1. It is picture day at school which means it is one of the only days of the year that he can’t pick out his outfit. He still manages to leave the house in a tie dye shirt. But at least it is under a sweater.
9:00 am- We arrive at school to find a note on the door stating that picture day is cancelled. No one is quite sure why. I am not a drinker, but I wonder if it is too early for a glass of wine?
9:00 am to 11:00 am – Two child free hours of bliss. My husband is home and we scurry about packing and cleaning.
11:15 am- Malone arrives home from school and insists on helping us with every task. You’ve been there before. You know how this goes. We are thankful for a child who has a desire to help us but…. (feel free to finish this sentence for me).
12:30 pm- After a quick stop at Subway we are begin our journey to Philadelphia. We’re “those” parents inside while we order our sandwiches. You know- the ones with the unruly children who you roll your eyes to and mutter about under your breath? Yep, that’s us today. Our normally well behaved obedient spawn has turned into an over excited rambunctious kid who has life and death opinions on chip and beverage choices.
2:00 pm- Malone is usually a champion car napper. However today he is too busy singing along to every #1 Beatles song ever written and asking random questions we don’t have the answer to. He’s got mad knock knock joke skills though. And he has to poop. I am no where close to any place to stop. Unless we pull off on the side of the freeway and use the road woods, an idea that husband deems “not worth it.”
2:30 pm- Rest stop found in the middle of Upstate NY. I can tell we must be close to the city- the family in front of us have on fur coats and are carrying expensive looking handbags. Neither is something I see routinely in my Happy Valley. Crisis averted.
2:30 to 4:00 pm- Smooth travels. Well, as smooth as they can be with a preschooler who is refusing to nap and is bored. There is no amount of Wonder Pets, car bingo, or I Spy that can save us. Everyone is relieved to hear a tiny voice pop up and say “I have potty.” Hello Rest Stop #2.
4:15 pm- Epic battle with Malone #2. We order a strawberry sundae for Mike and Malone to share while we are stopped. Malone wants chocolate, but didn’t voice his opinion until after order. Tough luck Chuck.
5:00 pm – Every parent’s nightmare blesses us too. Car vomit. I’m driving so I don’t get a first hand account with my eyes. My ears hear the splash. My nose smells curdled dairy. Mike notes pickles and ice cream. Poor puppy. Poor us (who still have two hours to go). Why does the universe hate us today?
5:05 pm- Thank goodness for a quick exit. I pull into TJ Maxx and run in for towels and a change of clothes. In the 20 seconds it takes for Mike to get out and come around to Malone’s door the kid falls asleep in his pool of vomit. It’s triple sad. He needs the nap but we have to clean him up.
5:10 pm – I’m back with fresh clothes and towels. Malone is naked in the parking lot. Mike is doing the best he can with baby wipes and Handiwipes. I get Malone quickly dressed and tag Mike out of the pukemobile. He keeps Malone busy while I pray for a stomach of steel. How does one get vomit out of a car seat latch? (scissors and qtips if you’re wondering)
5:25 pm- We’re back on the road again. Malone is punchy from no nap and keeping us entertained. Traffic is heavy. I just want to be there already. Eyes on the prize.
7:00 pm- Hello landing spot! Our hosts aren’t home (we knew they wouldn’t be). We let ourselves in and decide to divide and conquer. I give Malone a bath while Mike tackles uninstalling and cleaning up the car seat and everything else that was hit.
7:45 pm- Bath time is over. We’ve got laundry going. Time for some grub and Febreeze. The car smells like a frat house minus the armpits and beer. Lucky for us there is a pizza place and CVS right around the corner.
8:00 pm – I’m back, we’re at the table. I am at the grasping to my last ounces of strength. Dinner, bed. Dinner, bed. Dinner bed. I.AM.SO.CLOSE.
8:03 pm- “Mom, can I please have some milk?”
8:04 pm- “Momma, I don’t want white milk. I want chocolate milk.” Sorry buddy, they don’t have chocolate milk . Straight up lie. I just want to eat a bite of my cheese steak. It smells so good.
8:06 pm- “Momma, I don’t want salad with chicken. May I please have a banana?” He asked so politely. How could I refuse?
8:08 pm- “Mom. I don’t want my banana whole. I want it sliced and in a bowl.” Are you effing kidding me?
8:10 pm- Bananas sliced and in a bowl.
8:12 pm- “Mom, I’m done with these bananas.”
8:14 pm- “Mom, I’m hungry can I have something else?”
8:15 pm “EAT YOUR FUCKING BANANAS!! DRINK YOUR MILK!!” I take my cheese steak and storm off to the bathroom. I lock the door, sit on the toilet and eat in silence. And then I cry. This day has overwhelmed me. It stretched me to my limit and then some. I am sad that I am not more creative and couldn’t come up with more ideas to entertain him in the car. I am angry at the way I reacted to Malone. His actions and behaviors were a result of his day. A day where he spent the majority of his time trapped in a car seat. I am frustrated with myself and my actions. I was not steady and balanced. My emotions got the best of me, instead of Malone getting my best.
8:30 pm- Malone embraces me. I hold him tight. I tell him how sorry I was for yelling at him. Mommy made a mistake because she was frustrated. I tell him how much I love him. He understands and says I know you’re sorry Mama. We go up to our room to read stories and say our prayers.
9:30 pm- I go to sleep praying for forgiveness and thankful that tomorrow is a new day.
I’m linking up today with Shell at Things I Can’t Say. Thanks for giving me a space to Pour My Heart Out.
Oh, honey. 🙁 It sounds so awful, but comical at the same time! Glad you made it through. You are so not alone… I swear, having a toddler stretches patience like nothing else! ::hugs::
The post the other day on Inspired to Action really encouraged me. She was talking about how motherhood was hard for a reason- so that we’d lean to Jesus more. I thought to myself, how true. Did you read that one?
Oh, my friend. Can I just tell you how refreshing it is to see such honesty, including a few curse words, from a fellow lover of Christ? I know that’s probably not a popular opinion but I’m grateful anyway =)
Your day sounds awful. I’m so sorry that it was so bad!! There’s no way you could’ve done anything different, or laughed through it then (I would’ve been crying much earlier in the day)… I hope your weekend has been worth the day it took to get there =)
Anna recently posted..on traveling by air with baby
Thanks Anna… it was really a terrible day. I’m glad you could see where my heart really was. We all have been there. I feel like if I share what real motherhood looks like for me others will hopefully have the courage not to sugarcoat over everything too.
Oh, how I know those long car rides!
Someone almost always pukes. And every little thing seems so much more annoying!
Shell recently posted..Things They Can’t Say: Holiday Edition
Thankfully, I’ve just got one. I’d imagine with your tribe there is a puke domino effect!
What a day! I feel for you…I think we’ve all been there!! The vomit story made me think of when my husband and friend took a bunch of boys skiing and also took our dogs up with them. I was out with the moms when a picture came in on our phones from the boys…apparently the puppy got car sick and threw up (and more, think other end) all over the car about half way through the trip…on my son’s expensive computer backpack. All the boys then crammed into one car, leaving my poor husband to deal with the sick puppy and the stench for another 2 hours. That story has lived on and on!
Michelle recently posted..Remember When: Ladies Only Blog Share Link Party
Holy smokes! That story might trump mine! That poor puppy and your poor sweet husband. I’m not sure I’d be able to handle two hours of dog poo stench!
My story might not look exactly like yours but I have SO totally been THERE! It’s a sad place to be and there is nothing worse than the feeling where you know you screwed up as a mom. Luckily we get lots and lots of do-overs! Visiting from the Ladies Only Blog Share!
Angela recently posted..Ladies Only Blog Share Link Party: Remember When
I know that we’ve probably ALL been there at some point. You’re right. I think thick of it is so so sad. But now I can look back on it all and laugh!
I am so sorry that I laughed all the way through this. But, it felt like a recap of many days in my life! In fact, we just returned from a trip from SC to upstate NY (we DROVE!) and pretty much everything in the vomit and school pics was how it went for us too. I didn’t actually get to eat my dinner alone in the potty, but I did feel like crying! I knew it would be bad when 45 mins down the road the “are we there yet?” began.
Sorry to make light of your awful day. But I’m glad to know I’m not alone!
Alexa (Kat Biggie) recently posted..Home Again, Home Again
Don’t be sorry, I am so glad you laughed through it! Road trips with kids is always an adventure and we’ve had SO MANY great ones in comparison to this bad one!
This really was a no-good, horrible, very bad day!! I can definitely relate to those.
But I love the way you took it hour by hour, minute by minute, to tell the story. That is how you turn bad days into blogging gold!
Tracie recently posted..Watch Out For The Quicksand
I am so glad that you could relate to this story, I think that most people who are around small kiddos can, at least on some level!
Girl – we ALL have those days. It gets easier as they get older. 🙂
LyndaS recently posted..Not Your Boyfriend’s Headphones – Best Buy Mobile Store
Oh boy, I sure hope they do. It is interesting now (almost six months later) to look back on this. I still remember all of those feelings that day!
Oh this sounds terrible. I would have started drinking at 9:00am just knowing what was to come. LOL (Just kidding, of course. I totally would have waited until 11:00am).
Adrienne recently posted..Haters Gonna Hate: Writing Sponsored Posts
I think we all have days like that! I have my days when I feel like from the moment my feet hit the floor the world (and at least one of my kids) is just out to get me.
Stacey recently posted..Birthday Week Celebration: A Star Is Born!
These days are such tricky ones! I guess I’m glad that all the bad came out at once!
You had me at wanting wine in the am! We are so hard on ourselves as mothers. It seems to me you kept it pretty cool until you got way too hungry than any human should be. And in those cases, an “f-bomb” is more than acceptable. Heck, you described a day in my house perfectly and I have teenagers…well, they don’t sit in car seats and vomit, but there is vomit nonentheless, and their rooms smell like a frat house with BO, so there ya go! You did good!
[…] Every Thanksgiving, we head down to Philadelphia from MA to spend the long weekend with our in laws. Last year’s five hour road trip ended with my biggest motherhood meltdown to date. There is a comedy of errors that happened along the way, but I ended the day locked in a bathroom, crying, and… […]
Oh my, girlie! Honesty is your friend. I hope that you can laugh at this day, today, November 21, 2013.
Stopped by from #AskAwayFriday. Nice to meet you.
Wendy May recently posted..#AskAwayFriday, #16!
We did a lot of laughing today! I can’t believe the cheese steak toilet incident was a year ago!
[…] is SO HARD to pick just one! I wrote this one almost exactly one year ago. It is a tale of a series of unfortunate events that happened while we were traveling to PA for Thank…. It is a day in the life post that ends with my crying and eating a cheese steak on the toilet. I […]