Traveling for Thanksgiving is an always for us. We don’t travel for Christmas and we don’t live near any of our relatives. Yesterday was a terrible horrible no good day. As I reflect on it, there is nothing I can do but laugh. I hope you’ll do the same. *Warning… f-bomb used below.*
8:00 am – Epic battle with Malone #1. It is picture day at school which means it is one of the only days of the year that he can’t pick out his outfit. He still manages to leave the house in a tie dye shirt. But at least it is under a sweater.
9:00 am- We arrive at school to find a note on the door stating that picture day is cancelled. No one is quite sure why. I am not a drinker, but I wonder if it is too early for a glass of wine?
9:00 am to 11:00 am – Two child free hours of bliss. My husband is home and we scurry about packing and cleaning.
11:15 am- Malone arrives home from school and insists on helping us with every task. You’ve been there before. You know how this goes. We are thankful for a child who has a desire to help us but…. (feel free to finish this sentence for me).
12:30 pm- After a quick stop at Subway we are begin our journey to Philadelphia. We’re “those” parents inside while we order our sandwiches. You know- the ones with the unruly children who you roll your eyes to and mutter about under your breath? Yep, that’s us today. Our normally well behaved obedient spawn has turned into an over excited rambunctious kid who has life and death opinions on chip and beverage choices.
2:00 pm- Malone is usually a champion car napper. However today he is too busy singing along to every #1 Beatles song ever written and asking random questions we don’t have the answer to. He’s got mad knock knock joke skills though. And he has to poop. I am no where close to any place to stop. Unless we pull off on the side of the freeway and use the road woods, an idea that husband deems “not worth it.”
2:30 pm- Rest stop found in the middle of Upstate NY. I can tell we must be close to the city- the family in front of us have on fur coats and are carrying expensive looking handbags. Neither is something I see routinely in my Happy Valley. Crisis averted.
2:30 to 4:00 pm- Smooth travels. Well, as smooth as they can be with a preschooler who is refusing to nap and is bored. There is no amount of Wonder Pets, car bingo, or I Spy that can save us. Everyone is relieved to hear a tiny voice pop up and say “I have potty.” Hello Rest Stop #2.
4:15 pm- Epic battle with Malone #2. We order a strawberry sundae for Mike and Malone to share while we are stopped. Malone wants chocolate, but didn’t voice his opinion until after order. Tough luck Chuck.
5:00 pm – Every parent’s nightmare blesses us too. Car vomit. I’m driving so I don’t get a first hand account with my eyes. My ears hear the splash. My nose smells curdled dairy. Mike notes pickles and ice cream. Poor puppy. Poor us (who still have two hours to go). Why does the universe hate us today?
5:05 pm- Thank goodness for a quick exit. I pull into TJ Maxx and run in for towels and a change of clothes. In the 20 seconds it takes for Mike to get out and come around to Malone’s door the kid falls asleep in his pool of vomit. It’s triple sad. He needs the nap but we have to clean him up.
5:10 pm – I’m back with fresh clothes and towels. Malone is naked in the parking lot. Mike is doing the best he can with baby wipes and Handiwipes. I get Malone quickly dressed and tag Mike out of the pukemobile. He keeps Malone busy while I pray for a stomach of steel. How does one get vomit out of a car seat latch? (scissors and qtips if you’re wondering)
5:25 pm- We’re back on the road again. Malone is punchy from no nap and keeping us entertained. Traffic is heavy. I just want to be there already. Eyes on the prize.
7:00 pm- Hello landing spot! Our hosts aren’t home (we knew they wouldn’t be). We let ourselves in and decide to divide and conquer. I give Malone a bath while Mike tackles uninstalling and cleaning up the car seat and everything else that was hit.
7:45 pm- Bath time is over. We’ve got laundry going. Time for some grub and Febreeze. The car smells like a frat house minus the armpits and beer. Lucky for us there is a pizza place and CVS right around the corner.
8:00 pm – I’m back, we’re at the table. I am at the grasping to my last ounces of strength. Dinner, bed. Dinner, bed. Dinner bed. I.AM.SO.CLOSE.
8:03 pm- “Mom, can I please have some milk?”
8:04 pm- “Momma, I don’t want white milk. I want chocolate milk.” Sorry buddy, they don’t have chocolate milk . Straight up lie. I just want to eat a bite of my cheese steak. It smells so good.
8:06 pm- “Momma, I don’t want salad with chicken. May I please have a banana?” He asked so politely. How could I refuse?
8:08 pm- “Mom. I don’t want my banana whole. I want it sliced and in a bowl.” Are you effing kidding me?
8:10 pm- Bananas sliced and in a bowl.
8:12 pm- “Mom, I’m done with these bananas.”
8:14 pm- “Mom, I’m hungry can I have something else?”
8:15 pm “EAT YOUR FUCKING BANANAS!! DRINK YOUR MILK!!” I take my cheese steak and storm off to the bathroom. I lock the door, sit on the toilet and eat in silence. And then I cry. This day has overwhelmed me. It stretched me to my limit and then some. I am sad that I am not more creative and couldn’t come up with more ideas to entertain him in the car. I am angry at the way I reacted to Malone. His actions and behaviors were a result of his day. A day where he spent the majority of his time trapped in a car seat. I am frustrated with myself and my actions. I was not steady and balanced. My emotions got the best of me, instead of Malone getting my best.
8:30 pm- Malone embraces me. I hold him tight. I tell him how sorry I was for yelling at him. Mommy made a mistake because she was frustrated. I tell him how much I love him. He understands and says I know you’re sorry Mama. We go up to our room to read stories and say our prayers.
9:30 pm- I go to sleep praying for forgiveness and thankful that tomorrow is a new day.
I’m linking up today with Shell at Things I Can’t Say. Thanks for giving me a space to Pour My Heart Out.