Dear Overwhelmed Mom,
I have a few things I’ve been meaning to tell you. It feels scary and vulnerable to share them with you- mostly because I want you and the rest of the world to believe I have my act together. But really, I don’t. I am time strapped, stretched thin, and sometimes feel crushed under the weight of motherhood. Oh, and I don’t have a single clue what we’re having for dinner either.
This is the current state of our toy room.
And just like you no matter how many times my “helpers” and I clean it up, it ends up like this again. I know it is a sign of simple childhood calling and I love to sit for hours watching chubby hands play choo cho. But do you know what else? I wish it wasn’t toy chaos 24/7. And just like you, we’ve combed through and simplified our toys. We rotate them- the mess still multiples like bunnies.
My dishes are never done because my family will not stop eating. There are good moments left behind on these dirty dishes- breakfast conversation about what it means to be a good friend with a little boy who wears his heart of justice on his sleeve, a morning prayer whispered into my husband’s ear before he leaves for work, and new skills learned by a toddler who hates to sleep but loves to paint with yogurt.
[Tweet “My dishes are never done because my family will not stop eating.”]
And just like you, I long for the days when when my dishes were always done. Before I had my babies, this was easy. My sink will never be part of the daily sparkle and shine club. It sparkles and shines for a few minutes on Saturday mornings when I finally get a chance to attack and deep clean it. But otherwise? I’m a Fly Lady drop out. And oh yeah, I’ve got an entire folder of cleaning printables too. I’ve even printed out a few.
The sight of my laundry piles make twitchy. If there is one thing that makes me crazy, it is piles of laundry. There are some weeks where I am really on top of everything and there are some weeks where I think it might just be a better idea to go to Target and buy everyone a pack of clean undies.
And just like you, my to do list is growing just like my laundry piles. There are bills to pay, birthday party gifts to buy, and I’m worried about a few special people in my life. These people need more help than I can really offer outside of prayer and love. In the quiet moments, I whisper quiet prayers that include the words cancer, addiction, and unemployment.
My work load is increasing and my kid is experiencing a few challenges that require some extra attention. My kids were up with the sun this morning- before 6:00 am. Oh yeah, my sweet toddler had a huge meltdown in Target this morning too. You know those ones- the kind where strangers stare.
I want to tell you that really my life as a mother is overwhelming, but I am fighting really hard to just be welmed by it all.
These things are working for me, so maybe they’ll work for you too?
- Prayer. It changes everything. Really and truely.
- Doing the next right thing. I have so many things to do and I often feel like I don’t even know where to begin. But if I focus on just going the next right thing, I’m able to narrow my focus and turn my to do list into a to done list.
- Putting my screens away. Social media steals a lot of time if you let it, so when life gets really big, I turn my online life off.
- Ditching commitments once in awhile. I am a follow through-er and a woman of my word. But missing a swim lesson or having a library book that’s over due by a few days isn’t the end of the world.
- Doing more of what I love. I love to read and write. So sometimes, I use those as leverage to help motivate me to get things done.
- I stopped fighting with my kids over petty power struggles. Instead, I fight hard for their character. It is so liberating!
I know you’re overwhelmed, mama. We all are. We’re burning the candle at both ends- trying to make it all happen and do the best we can for our families. But I want to let you know that you’re not alone.
Love,
NJ
Thank you for this post – I needed it today!
I have 2 little girls, I was 31 when I became a mom for the first time.
Lauren recently posted..Living Life Vertically: An Update
I was 23 when I had my first baby he was actually suppose to be born a day before my 23rd birthday but he wanted to wait and was born 4 days after. Then at 24 I had my beautiful little girl. So 2 wonderful children is what I was blessed with.
Wise words – thank you for sharing them! I think it was Elisabeth Elliot I first heard say “just do the next thing” and it’s my #1 piece of advice to overwhelmed moms. I’m so glad you are joining in this terrific project for Mother’s Day!
Linda recently posted..Dear Mom . . . who also is my daughter {a blog hop with a HUGE Mother’s Day Giveaway!}
Yes! I have days where I have feel like I have my act together, and many days where it’s the complete opposite, and then most days it’s in between. There’s alway something to put away, and I’m learning to accept that. I want to enjoy life and being a mom and not constantly worried that I have things that have to be done. I’m learning to unplug more on the weekends and not let all my to-do’s overrun my life. I really appreciate seeing the photos of what your home looks like — my home looks like that too!
Bev recently posted..Life lately
I went from washing dishes to buying paper plates.. Ha ha.. Mommyhood is so overwhelming but it’s life and I envy those mamas that don’t let the clutter bother them. That is not me for sure.
This is such a wonderful post for so, so many reasons and I truly appreciate your authenticity and vulnerability. My favorite line is at the end, “I stopped fighting with my kids over petty power struggles. Instead, I fight hard for their character. It is so liberating!”. Absolutely agree and love the message!
Michelle @ Sunshine and Hurricanes recently posted..Mother’s Day Giveaway $500 CASH!!!
This is such a wonderful reminder. I just have my second child over the weekend and we are already feeling a little overwhelmed. I definitely read this at a great time!
Social media will suck out your time. I find myself supposed to be folding clothes and then I get a Facebook notification and then an hr later the clothes are just left wherever smh
Kita recently posted..DIY Mother’s Day Gifts
Kids grow up so quickly! I remember those days of being overwhelmed and the kitchen never staying clean for long. Now when the grandkids come over, it seems like old times. 🙂
Great giveaway!
Alli recently posted..DIY Sunday Showcase 5.03
I was 30 when I had my first daughter. We got married when I was then 31 and we had our second daughter when I was 33. But I often say to my husband, the reason our place would look just like this at times that’s because we’re in the house all day. Once we clean up then we should get out!!! LOL.
Janelle recently posted..How I Made This Bloom Dress For My LP Daughter in 30 Minutes See How You Can Make One Too [DIY]
Wow! Thanks for sharing a glimpse of real life. From the laundry stacked down the hallways to the dishes piled in the sink and toys EVERYWHERE, I’m right there with you! It always helps for moms to help and encourage each other. Happy Mother’s Day!
[…] an overwhelmed mom with a lot on my plate. My free time is limited, but I still make reading a […]
LOVE this mama. It’s messy, real, and BEAUTIFUL, this life. <3
Kerri @ Haven Way recently posted..5 Types of Books to Display at Home
[…] PS: Are you feeling overwhelmed as a mother? I wrote a letter to you. Catch it here. […]
Oh my goodness its so awesome to be reminded that one is not alone in this trying but wonderful journey called “motherhood”
You described my life and made me smile thanks, now to get back to those dishes!
I truly needed this today. This blessed me.
Thank God for this-it really was right on time! Overwhelmed mom of 5, one a 4 month old and another with behavioral and health issues at the present time. Made me laugh/exhale and regroup all at the same time! God bless you!