The other night I collapsed into bed. I crawled in and melted into a puddle. And then I cried myself to sleep. I wasn’t sad about anything. I wasn’t upset, troubled, or worried.
I was exhausted.
If you’ve been reading along, then you know I’ve got preschooler and a newborn. And if this is your first time here…welcome! I’ve got a preschooler and a newborn.
I’ve been burning the candle at both ends a bit. The work of motherhood and the work of writing had finally caught up to me. Both are muscles I am exercising HARD these days.
And for the first time I wondered if doing 31 Days Of Big Girl Panties was really a wise decision considering my other obligations. But I am here, and I am committed to seeing this challenge through. What fun would a writing challenge be if it wasn’t challenging?
And I can’t quit motherhood.
What I can do is get a little smarter and listen to my body. To make sure my basic needs are met. I’ve thought a little bit about what my basic needs are and I’ve decided to define them as life sustaining tasks that feed my mind, body, and soul. A little self care will go a long way.
I don’t need to shower everyday, but I do need quiet time to seek God. Although a shower WOULD be nice.
I don’t need to consume a five star organic homemade meal, but I do need to eat SOMETHING.
I don’t need to sleep through the night, but I do need to sleep, power down my brain, and recharge.
I don’t need to go to the bathroom BY MYSELF, but I do need to go.
I don’t need to drink coconut water, seltzer, or fruit infused water, but I need to drink WATER. And I need to drink about 8 glasses more than I’ve currently been consuming.
I don’t need to write 1000 words everyday, but I do need to write. It feeds my soul and lets my mind breathe.
I don’t need to be on the floor playing with my kids every single second of the day or get away on a romantic date with my husband. But I need to hear, spend quality time, and love on my family everyday.
I don’t need to spend hours on the phone with my friends and family everyday letting them know how much I care about them, but I do need to show them by love and deed as much as I have capacity for.
Oh. And COFFEE. I need coffee. Everyday.
And anything else that can happen in 24 fours?
Have you ever had a hard time meeting your basic needs while taking care of your family? Did you make any changes to your routine to help?
This post is part of a 31 day series about Big Girl Panties. Click here to read the rest of the series.
I LOVE this post!! We at my org MotherWoman are always talking about the need to lower the bar during the early months/years of motherhood and making sure that the basic self-care of us as mothers is at the center of what we do as mothers. Is be very interested in reposting your blog or a blog you have coming up on our Huffington Post page if you’re interested. You can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org if you’re interested.
And take good care!! We can’t give from an empty well.
Thanks Liz. I’ll consider it!
I’m pretty good at getting my basic needs met but what’s harder (more complicated) is getting away from it all every once in awhile, which is what I need to keep my sanity. I managed to go to Europe for a week last year, right before I became pregnant with Micah and I felt so renewed after that trip. Smaller outings help, too. I went out for a friend’s birthday last night and I felt so calm this morning, even as I was hustling to get three kids ready for apple picking and one of them kept having a crying, screaming fit.
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I can see how hard it would be for you, since Micah is still nursing! Getting out without the kids is so important… I’m already dreaming of my next “momcation.”
Great post! You have to take of yourself in order to be your best self. I’m pregnant with baby #2 and I can only imagine what life will be like with a preschooler and a newborn. I know it’s going to be chaotic and challenging, especially the first few months, but if I don’t take time for me (even just for a few minutes each day), I’ll lose sight of myself and being the best mom I can be for my kids.
Melissa @ Fit ‘n’ Well Mommy recently posted..Friday Favorites!
It is going a lot better than I thought it would! I spent a lot of time worrying about logistics and feelings this summer (for my preschooler). As it turns out, life just keeps on going and we just drag Lola along with us! I have a harder time getting some of my easy to forget basics in. Last night I went to bed early, but realized I hadn’t had a single ounce of water that didn’t come in the form of coffee all day!
[…] Last night, I went to bed not knowing (but hoping) the Red Sox were going to the World Series. I wanted to stay up but I didn’t think I could convince Lola to sleep through the night at 8 weeks. And I have needs too. […]