Ask Away Friday With Mama Rabia!

Ask Away Friday is here again! The kids and I are back from our trip to Illinois to visit my family. I was basically offline the entire time I was there and I am so behind now in the online world. The last time I looked, I had 20 comments to reply to and return. For me, that is my favorite part of blogging! I will get to it, promise! This weekend we’re headed to Cape Cod to visit my mother in law. Sigh. Next week, life will be back to “normal” for the first time since before Christmas!

This week, Rabia from The Lieber Family traded 10 questions. I’m pretty sure Rabia and I met on Twitter, either through #SitsSharefest or #FMFParty, but I can’t remember which. Both are weekly twitter parties and I know our circles overlap. I love Rabia because she is funny and kind and she writes from a place of honesty. What more do you need in a blog?

Ask Away Friday is a link up hosted by Penny of The Real Housewife Of Caroline County and Amber of Bold Fab Mom.

1.       I love, love, love your “big girl panties” series, mainly because I use that phrase often myself.  Which one of the posts was hardest for you to write?

Big Girl Panties! Writing those have been some of my favorite posts of all time. It has fizzled a little bit, but I want to pick it up again in the new year.

Grief Comes In Waves  was probably the hardest one to write because there was so much emotion that poured out during it. I had to go back to bed because writing those words and letting those feelings come to the surface was exhausting.

You didn’t ask, but my favorite from that series is A Day In The Life. 

2.       I love your kids’ names.  How did you pick them out? Are they family names or something from your classic rock playlists?

We named Malone after Sam Malone from Cheers. And Malone named Lola because his favorite song is Lola by The Kinks.

3.       You say your husband is an introvert. How does he feel about your blogging and need for interaction?

He’s really proud of me and all that I have accomplished here in this tiny space!

Our marriage works well because I give him the space he needs to recharge after a long day. By the time we’ve put the kids to bed around 7:30 pm, he is talked out. He’s worked all day, come home to dinner time conversation, and played with the kids. He is DONE and needs quiet time to recharge. I usually hop back online to blog while he does his own thing. It is weird, but it works well for us.

We hang out with each other and the kids a lot on the weekends and in the mornings before he goes to work.

4.       Describe a perfect day for you.

I would love 24 hours to do nothing. Literally, nothing. Alone. With no one. I am in a hard season right now where my children really need me both day and night. I would love a day at a hotel with room service, wifi,  a stack of good books, and chocolate. I’ve got a term for this, I call it a sleepcation. That is exactly what I need!

Perfect day #2. I haven’t been yet, but spending a day at a blog conference sounds pretty awesome too!

5.       Do you have a draft folder full of unfinished blog posts?  What’s the oldest post in it and why haven’t you finished it?

Funny you should ask. I was actually just thinking the other day that I wanted to finish it. The 10 Commandments Of Blogging. I’ve gotten as far as #1. Thou Shall not use captcha.

6.       On Monday, I wrote about making mistakes. What’s the biggest mistake you’ve made that taught you the best lesson?

When I was in the 5th grade, I was caught forging my mother’s name on a failing math test. After that, I learned how to sign her name better!

I’m not a monster, I swear!

There are VERY FEW things in life that are unfixable. I believe in owning my mistakes. Quick action and an apology usually go REALLY far.

7.       You seem like a pretty laid back mama, but what’s your parenting pet peeve?

My biggest pet parenting pet peeve is when another adult tries to push their parenting agenda on our kids. There is NO NEED to parent my kid if I am right there and in the middle of handling the situation myself. I don’t need you to jump in and “try” help. I know they are trying to be helpful, but really it just makes me stabby. This happens from time to time when we’re with extended family and it drives me insane.

I think the most important thing a parent can do is to remember that their child is still a child and have expectations that are reasonable and developmentally appropriate for their age. Sometimes it is easy to lose sight of the fact that they are still learning EVERYTHING. Everything is new to them and exciting, and it is my job to meet them where they are at and share in their joys with them.

8.       Are you typically a night owl or a morning person and how has having kids changed that?

I am a complete morning person. My alarm goes off around 4:30 am and if I am diligent about getting up, I have about two hours to myself before Malone wakes up. It is the only time of the day that I can count on my house being quiet and typically when I get the biggest bulk of blogging done. I like to wake up, get coffee, have quiet time and read the Bible, reply to comments, and then read/comment on as many blogs as I can.

Before I had kids, I liked to go to bed somewhere between eleven and midnight. After I had Malone, I quickly realized I was going to have to shift my sleeping habits. I am at my best when I am well rested. And my kids deserve the best version of me that I can present on a daily basis, not Crankasourus Rex.

9.       If you could go forward or backward 100 years, which would you choose and why?

Honestly, neither. I really love the time I’m living in now. Knowing what I know now and stepping back in time 100 years, would not work for me unless I could go straight to Downton Abbey, live in a bubble, and be Lady Mary’s BFF.

Going forward 100 years wouldn’t work either. I think I would be too depressed if I knew certain social justice issues didn’t move forward the way I hope they do. And don’t even get me started on the technology. My grandmother is is 80 years old. In her lifetime she seen her favorite soap opera that started on radio  move to television and now to online, that is a lot of technology to wrap your head around in a lifetime. I can’t imagine what technology will be like in 100 years. And honestly, I don’t want to know.

10.   Do you have a favorite charity or non-profit that you support?  Tell us about it.

The kids and I go to the parents center several times a week. It is a drop in co-operative playgroup run by a parent volunteer board, a director, and an assistant director. It is a donation based group that operates on a shoestring budget.

There are three very large rooms for the kids to play in that have a ton of cool toys. In the gross motor room there are mats to climb and jump on in the center of the room and 30 or more bikes/riding toys that can be ridden around the perimeter of the room. There is also a creative arts room with easels and paint, play kitchens, a train table, a puppet theater, a doll house, cars, trucks, blocks, a table with play dough, a dress up corner with tons of costumes, and a rice table . In the third room there are baby toys, a glider, books, puzzles, and baby dolls. They serve a snack for the kids and have tea and coffee for the grown ups.  Once a week host a free music class.

In other words. This place is a lifesaver.

It is open four days a week and we try to go at least twice. We’ve made a ton of friends because a lot of the families come on a regular basis. It is really cool because it isn’t just for moms. There is a whole tribe of stay at home dads, nannies, and grandparents that come too!

I serve on the board and give my time and talents in other ways as often as I can. We just had a pretty big online fundraiser and I did a lot of the social media for it.

Rabia had some great questions, didn’t she? Head on over to her blog to read her answers to my questions too!